


If Home is Where the Heart is Then We're All Just Fucked

by downeylove



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Gen, Iron Dad, Peter is Tony's son, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Uncle James "Rhodey" Rhodes, spider son
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-06
Updated: 2018-12-06
Packaged: 2019-09-13 05:31:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16886550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/downeylove/pseuds/downeylove
Summary: Peter returns from the Soul World.





	If Home is Where the Heart is Then We're All Just Fucked

Peter is painfully aware of every ache in his body, of the hard rubble underneath him, his stinging wounds – everything. He’s also aware that the faint orange glow behind his eyelids is familiar and not at all what he’s become accustomed to in the last several months.

It’s the orange glow that was the last thing to fade when he was taken to the Soul World. He’s on Titan again, which is odd because he could’ve sworn he’d just been with the Other Peter, the shirtless grey dude, and the nice lady with the antennas. They’d all materialized together, confused and scared in a vast wasteland of nothing. 

And then others started arriving, and he knew they lost. And this was some cursed purgatory they would never be able to escape. 

But now, he can feel the ground beneath him, his wounds returned from the day they’d vanished, and the same orange glow he’d come to fear in his dreams.

Peter is also aware of the person calling his name and shaking his shoulder gently. It’s a voice he recognizes, but an unexpected one.

“Mr. Rhodey?” He grounds, eyes still clamped shut.

“Yeah, it’s me, kid. You’re alright.” Rhodey grips Peter’s shoulder tightly.

Peter opens his eyes and everything is fuzzy. Rhodey is kneeling over him, but next to him is a blurry, bearded figure. His heart leaps.  _ Mr. Stark! _

But when everything swims into focus, it’s not Mr. Stark at all. 

“Captain America?”

“Peter, right?” His face is dirty and there are several slowly healing cuts on his face. But above all, his somber demeanor sets Peter on edge immediately.

“What happened?” Peter looks between the two, who exchange a glance with one another. “Where’s Mr. Stark?”

“Peter–” Rhodey begins, but Peter cuts him off. 

“Where is he?” Peter turns to Cap. He doesn’t know the man, other than their one confrontation in Berlin. He won’t lie to Peter.

His eyes fall shut and he shakes his head. “He’s gone.”

“Where?” But he knows where.  _ Gone _ .

“He didn’t make it. He’s dead,” Captain America says finally. He looks down at Peter, and the sadness behind his eyes – the regret – is shocking to see on such a famously stoic face. The first superhero ever. Peter’s favorite until Tony Stark came along. And all he wants to do is hit him.

Tears well in Peter’s eyes and he looks at Rhodey who is avoiding eye contact with him. His head is bowed low, the War Machine suit making it difficult for him to hide his face.

“There was something we had to do to get everyone back,” Cap continues. “A sacrifice.”

“And he–” Peter chokes on his words, the weight of his new reality crashing into him with full force.

“For you,” Rhodey finishes. “He did it for you.”

Peter’s breaths come in short gasps and he rolls onto his side, dragging himself away from them, away from their news. “He’s not. He can’t be. He can’t.”

Rhodey flocks to Peter’s side and pulls him into a tight embrace. The metal is cold against his cheek, and it certainly isn’t comfortable. But it reminds him that he  _ is _ alive. Just how Mr. Stark wants him. Alive and safe and surrounded by people who won’t let anything happen to him again.

He cries against Rhodey, holding onto some metal piece that might break off if he squeezes too hard. Cap stands above them silently. Peter can feel the palpable grief coming from him. He suddenly pushes away from Rhodey and scrambles to his feet in a rage.

“Why did you let him do that? Why couldn’t it have been you?” Peter shouts. Angry tears mix with the sweat and dirt on his face.

Cap takes a step back, alarmed.

“Peter–” Rhodey grabs his arm but Peter yanks it away.

“You let him  _ die _ for the universe! For you! When have you ever sacrificed anything for him?” Peter pushes Captain America with all his strength, sending him sliding across the rocky, uneven terrain of Titan.

“Peter!” Rhodey grabs Peter again, and this time he lets him.

Peter’s forehead makes an audible  _ thunk! _ When he rests it against the breastplate of Rhodey’s suit, his shoulders shaking with his silent sobs. 

Peter hears the crunching of dirt underfoot as Cap approaches them again. He’s quiet and offers no defense for his actions. Peter can nearly reach out and feel the guilt overwhelming the great Captain America. He stands silently behind him, quietly letting Peter come to terms with what they’ve told him.

But he never will.

The world had been so cruel to Tony before. It’s only fitting that the universe be just as cruel to him in his tragic end. Peter isn’t sure what kind of sacrifice was worth the entirety of existence, but he doesn’t care. He’d spend a thousand years in the Soul World if it meant Tony was alive and well. 

But that’s just it. Peter had come to know Tony better than he ever thought possible. His own self reproach was far beyond anything Peter had ever experienced himself. Tony probably did everything in his power to make sure everyone who’d vanished was returned safely in the real world where they belong. Especially Peter. That’s just the kind of person he is.  _ Was _ . Always carrying the weight of the universe on his shoulders, coupled with Peter’s own safety and wellbeing.

But why should he care if the universe has returned to its natural state if it means he’s lost  _ another _ person he loves? Another person who cares for him and protects him and treats him like a son. He doesn't care. Not really. He just wants Tony.

He lost his parents. He lost Uncle Ben. And just when he thought he had it all – Aunt May, the mother figure who’s always been there, and Tony, a surrogate father who sees him as his own – Peter doesn’t think he can take it anymore. How many parents can he possibly lose in one lifetime? How much more can he withstand? How much more of this pain can he handle before it breaks him completely?

He can’t. And he doesn’t want to.

He doesn’t want to live in a world where Tony Stark doesn’t exist. Doesn’t take care of him, or berate him for making too many pop culture references. He doesn’t want to go through his life without the man he’d come to love as more than just a mentor.

Peter doesn’t want to live without Tony even in the best circumstances.

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to kayytx for fixing all the issues with this short dumb story. And dealing with the suffering.


End file.
